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destiny

A letter to my 13 year old self

In 2007, I was 38, I wrote a letter to my 13 year old self as part of a blog Meme.

I loved reading this again, and will now add my 40’s.

I hope this inspires you to write to your budding teenage self!

(clearing throat, wiping eyes)

Dear Heike,

Yipee! You are 13!! Finally, you hit your teens. Isn’t this the day you have been waiting for? If you could only be like all the other thirteen year olds…but you can’t. It is ok, soon, you will not have to change so much to fit in. Actually, you will be honored because you are so different.

The rest of your teens are filled with adventure, a few authentic friends, and many people who just want to take advantage of you. Heed them! And do not let them into your house. You will know who your true friends are, and they will be with you for a long time. Be nice to your mama, she is doing the best she can. If I could keep you off that motorcycle, I would. Too many close calls :), but you are a bit of a wild child with a very sensible brain.

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Fuzzy blast from my 20’s past

Your 20’s start out with a bang, and an accident that will change your life. You will think it is the end of the world, but it is not. You will survive the pain, the uncertainty, and all the follow up operations. And you will carry all the scars with pride, because you have conquered. When you are MUCH older, you will discover Frida Kahlo, the courageous and ingenious artist who had a brace just like you. I promise, you will overcome. A man you can’t stand to be around becomes your soulmate, and you will marry him. When you are 28, you will have a baby they say you will never have. She is a miracle.

Your 30’s are pretty awesome. You are a mama now, and you have learned from many of your past mistakes. Everything you endured growing up, will now make you strong and opinionated. You will become a Goddess, and finally find your clan. You will also find your path, and all your past and present dreams will make more sense. They are your calling. You will have another baby, and they are both fabulous. You are an artist, and your hands make you happy.

Your 40’s make you feel like you are 25 again. Not in the body, but the BRAIN! Your Spirit is vibrant, and feisty! You begin to get more interested in politics, because you want to make your home a better place to live. You become a very vocal pain in the butt, and people know your name, even if it is a bit difficult for people to say! Your children are now teens, and they are pretty opinionated, fantastic humans. They are a lot like you are now: primal, smart, feisty, wild, and they drive you crazy. Your daughter is the confident young Goddess woman you wanted her to become, she has enough confidence for a whole country.  You are becoming a mentor for a younger generation, as you walk between the lines of society. You are the keeper of the Goddess, and your work is with women & girls, making them warriors. You are still working with your hands, your dreams, and your intuition.

As you get older, your life just keeps getting better. Just like a good wine ;).

Love,
Heike

Releasing 2014 – Shit happens

In a few days, 2014 will be over. Not sure how it got here so fast, but alas, it is here.

2014 was going to be MY YEAR. The year everything got better, I realized all my dreams, lost weight, grew all the food for my family, canned all our excess, rode a unicorn, learned to fly….etc.

I had high hopes & fantastic resolutions.

I am sitting here with my 2015 Life & Biz workbook, celebrating & releasing 2014, and realize that I

did not make shit happen. Not only that, lots of shit happened.

Why am I telling you this instead of giving you an uplifting, goddess-like inspiration for the new year? Because I am honest, and I love you :)…Because life comes with unexpected shit, and how you deal with it is what makes all the difference.

So first, be real. Gosh, if you can, order this workbook (you can get it starting at $9.99…give yourself that gift) because it really gets down to the nitty gritty, or just start with a fresh piece of paper and do the express version. Write down, color, fingerpaint all the CHALLENGES from 2014 first. Now, do the same for all the SHIT THAT HAPPENED (no, not the same thing). Have a biz, think about what happened there, what needs to change, why didn’t you make money? Be honest, this is not group therapy, no one but you is going to see this.

I have been siting here since 3am, and doing this exercise made me realize:
1. I have been lazy. Honestly, had I done half of what I said I would do in 2014, I would be further along. Maybe not all lazy, but definitely gave other things priority. Thought to ponder: Why are MY things not priority?
2. As much as I love my business/art, time to decide whether it still serves ME as a business.
3. WHY have I not started on the workshops/goals I wrote down last year?
4. Time management is crucial
5. It is ok not to fill out all the blank spaces someone else created (there is a metaphor there)
6. Clutter and un-organized living suck…literally. Both suck the energy out of your soul & house. Plus, I am spending more time looking for crucial things like receipts and other things I need than I am on working my biz….Now there is another metaphor.

So, I am writing down all my rants & challenges for 2014, and kissing them good-bye. Not without scrutiny though, since you should make every challenge a learning opportunity, and only make a mistake once.

Once your art piece is done, love it, hate it….if you want, send it in the fire with love. Remember, YOU are the creator of your destiny!

Much love to you!
Heike

Life sucks

I am finding more and more that certain people love tragedy. It is as if they thrive on the negative aspects of their life, instead of the positive. Unfortunately, they have a way of influencing the circle around them, people or animals that they touch.

I am not one of those people. Actually, their aura gives me sad vibes. I want to help them. I want to pull them up by their coattails and say: “STOP!!”

Is this possible? “Thinking positive”, or the Law of Attraction, is a billion dollar industry. People want to be be happy, they want their dreams fulfilled, they WANT.  But, isn’t that counterproductive? If you WANT all the time, instead of being in a blissful state of gratefulness?

How can you be in a blissful state of gratefulness when your life is shit right now??

Now THAT is the billion dollar question.

I don’t have the answer, otherwise I would be a billionaire :).

This is what I have learned, and what I live by now: Even when things suck, and it seems to be getting worse, there is SOMETHING in your life that you can be grateful for. THAT is what you want to think about, that is what will make you smile, and help pull you out of the rut. You take whatever challenge you have, and think about what you are supposed to learn from it.

We are going through some challenges now, and that is exactly how I am keeping from freaking out. I am analyzing the situation, picking out what my lesson is. I remind myself of all the fabulous things I have every day: my family, my friends, my dog who is definitely a teacher on primal & simple living (more on that later), my home. I have lots of things in abundance, much of what I don’t need right now. These things make me reflect on the reason I bought them, and that makes is very easy for me to give them away to friends, with love. They think I am doing them a favor, when they are actually doing ME a favor :).

My advice? Get quiet,  move away from panic, ground yourself (leaning up against a tree, by yourself, is like a miracle worker touching your brain), and learn your lesson. Then, remind yourself that you are powerful, and figure out step one. Leave behind any inhibitions, and just DO IT.

Always remember: YOU are the creator of your own destiny.

The Universe has got your back!
Much love,
Heike