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dreams

Hot Stuff had my back while I finally got my DREAM TATTOO

I finally got my tattoo.

This journey began when I was about 18. I really wanted a tattoo. At that time, tattoos were still a sign that you were either a biker chick, a hooker, a jailbird, and only if you looked very exotic could it MAYBE be a tribal thing. It was a tabu, and my family would have been aghast.

Even tScreen Shot 2016-08-11 at 11.19.22 PMhough, I wanted to get the Hot Stuff the Red Devil from Caspar the Friendly Ghost tattooed on my stomach. Don’t ask.

Alas, the taboo and the fact that the only place to get one was the redlight district, it did not happen. It’s a good thing, he would have been sliced in half two years later when I had my car accident.

Fast forward about a lifetime. In the last 10 years or so, tattoos have become such a mainstream thing, you see them everywhere. Every day I would awe or cringe away from someone’s body art. I would make drawings, get ideas….but never found the person to do it.

I view a tattoo as a sacred, intimate  thing. You are literally letting a person etch a permanent picture into your skin. I am amazed at how lackadaisical people can be, deciding in the moment to get a tattoo. Friends getting matching flowers (what if you don’t like the flower, or break up with the friend?), names of lovers, drunk group tattoos from a poster in the tattoo parlor, you get the picture.

I literally sat on this for YEARS!! Yes, YEARS. And I consider myself a pretty spontaneous person.

One day I walked into a tattoo parlor with my 18 year old daughter, because she wanted to get a nose ring (also a tabu in my time, but she would have passed, as she exotically gorgeous. My nose does not need any more attention, so it was not an issue) . In the sea of classic tattoo posters on the wall, and head to toe tatted people, for the first time I did not feel threatened. I was in a beautiful restored Victorian, buzzing with tattoo machines and happy people murmering.

While I was waiting, I began a conversation with Grimace, a tattoo artist. Me: White, suburban, middle aged witch who FINALLY wants to get her first tattoo. I felt like a 45 year old virgin.

When I told him what I wanted, he just let me finish, then said: “That is a lot of things for one area.”

Yes, well I have been collecting things to add to MY tattoo for about 30 years, Sir.

He convinced me to pick what was most important. I already moved my spot from my back (yes, that is where my life karma plays out, but then I can’t see it) to my shoulder. I made an appointment, and sent him about 1000 pictures of tattoos I collected over the years. Trees, wolves, moons, flowers, more flowers, herbs, witches, etc.

The day was finally here, and I almost chickened out. What if I don’t like it? What if it hurts? What if I don’t like it??????

I went. My picture as not done. I almost ran, but he showed me the wolf. It was perfect, I knew everything around it would just be too.

I sat and breathed, felt the pain, and almost cried happy tears because this was what I wanted for so long. I felt like the wolf, my guardian from the day I almost killed myself with my car on the Autobahn, was being brought out so I can have him by my side all the time. I thought about the morning I woke up a few years ago during tumultuous time, with a paw print red on my neck ( I took pictures of it before it vanished). The pain become almost rhythmic, and though present, I would call it meditative.

My daughter came with me as my anchor. Her face showed awe. I could not wait to see it.

Finally, after a few hours, it was finished.

Meet my wolf. We are one.

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Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness

As you may know, I homeschool my kids. Today, we continued our history lesson on the American Revolution by watching an excellent film series by the History Channel called America – The Story of Us.

They really know how to bring the Revolution, and the key players, to life. Daniel Morgen, the intelligent drunk who led the militia and highly expertised “mountain” soldiers, George Washington, the rebel leader 🙂 (I had no idea, the man was a courageous hunk!), and all the strong and willful men and women who settled in the United States. The hardships they endured to fulfill their dreams, as simple and insignificant as they may seem today.

Freedom? Choices?
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created
equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable
Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.
That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, …
That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends,
it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it.”

Hard to believe this was drafted over 200 years ago. And what people had to endure and sacrifice to receive these simple rights.

Fast forward to today. A nation under siege of the bad economy. Torn, strapped, angry…People are spoiled from living the Good Life for so long, and now can’t cope.

Personally, I was so impressed by the images of this film, and thinking about the strength and will these people had.

I felt wimpy. Yes, wimpy.

There is no reason in the world that I cannot have what I want in life. There is no reason that I cannot travel the road to my dream immediately. There is no reason that I cannot make enough money for my family to have what they need to live fulfllled and happy, with my talents. There is no reason that I let my body get weak, and then complain of getting ill and feeling fatigued. There is no reason that my husband, who works like a dog on a schedule that would have killed me 3 years ago, can’t quit and do the work he loves. It is all about how you see life, and thinking about what you REALLY want, and what you willing to do to get it. Anything?

Yes, I am getting off my ass immediately.
Why don’t you get off of yours and join me.

With love,
Heike

Treasure Hunter and Dream Seeker

This one is long, but grab a glass of wine and stay with me.

Almost 6 months ago a friend told me about “compactors”, people who sign a contract and vow not buy anything new for 1 year. What a fabulous idea! I mulled over this some time, discussed it with the family, and we ventured into our own version of compacting. I joined our local Freecycle group, and the adventure began!

If you are wondering why I did not join and sign the compact contract, well, it is because I do not do well with rules, so I would never voluntarily inflict them on myself. And I don’t buy used shoes. And, even though some of the posts on the compact yahoo list were very helpful and informative, as with every group online, there are always a few assholes to spoil the fun.

I have always been a thrift store queen. I LOVE thrift stores…Seriously. The thought of making a great deal and saving the environment, and at the same time kicking consumerism and debt in the ass is so empowering and bitchin’ :). Finding Freecycle and a few other resource unknown to me was great. Now, when we need something big, like a drum, a dryer, 1000 legos, a watering can, a lawn mower, etc, we go to Freecycle (these are all things we have WANTED, and RECEIVED.) When I find things in my house I would never give away, but I don’t need, I put them on Freecycyle and find the perfect, thankful owner for them! My kids live in breathe in the environment, and they see Freecycle as our personal department store.

To get to the reason for this long intro: I wanted to share some keypoints of my day with you. My brain ramble will come together somewhere down there!

This morning my kids had piano and guitar lessons with our fabulous Ms.Lisa
who is just awesome! She is teaching my daughter to play the blues on the guitar, so B.B. King watch out! My 6yr old has written 2 Rexi songs for his dog and is playing them on the piano.

While they are making wonderful music, I am preparing my package to send to Oprah. Yes, that Oprah. :)…I wrap up my book and a Goddess that my kids deemed the “Oprah Goddess” in a magical little package. Now I am manifesting the package becomes invisible to all the screeners and looky-loos, and ends up in Oprah’s hands. I want to go on Oprah, that’s that. She personafies everything I want to be. Anyways, the kids were done, we sprinkled our package with magic invisi powder, and right before we walk out the door, I run to check something on the computer.

There is an email from one of my favorite thrift stores that says: TODAY ONLY ALL CLOTHES 50% OFF! OMG, my heart races!!

So off we go to the post office, then of course to the thrift store. We were like three treasure hunters, making our way through the crowd. We unearthed:

3 pairs of Levi’s for me (My ass is special. Only certain jeans fit my ass, and I never find any. Today I found 3..so I had to buy them all. If I would have found 10, I would have bought them too….)
1 pair of jeans for Mr. Heike
1 pair of shorts for Mr. Heike
1 pair of capris for me, and 1 pair for Heike Jr.
1 bathing suit for me, and 1 bathing suit for Heike Jr.
4 long sleeved cotton shirts
1 blouse
1 dress (notice I am not writing who gets what…)
1 hand crochet blanket for my fabulous vacation van
, or future home.
1 salad spinner and 1 vegetable cutter
1 pair of shoes
1 beautiful goddess jewelry box, brand new, for Heike Jr because she is so wonderful.
1 truck for Heike Jr. #2, because he is so wonderful.
My total? $46 with tax!!!!
Whew! Let me fan myself!!!

🙂
To celebrate our finds, we went to Haggin’s and had our first fruit freezes for the year. You know, to acclimate ourselves for the summer.

I ended this successful day with salmon, wine, 2 hours on the phone with long-time-not-seen-friends-who-are-fabulous-and-inspiring, and a little teary-eyed blogging (see buttons to your right under my goddesses, and check these women out! Let’s send out some cyber love!!)

Almost fini.

P.S. I want to mention the BLOGHER ad you see on the sidebar. BlogHer is a women owned company, and I am honored to be on their blogger roll. I am talking quality info and ads, I never have to worry that you will see kacka. Plus, you can see what some other bloggers are doing :). Now they are asking for YOUR opinion, to make the network even better. And you can win prizes (Nothing like like a surprise prize for this mama!). So please take a moment to check out http://deploy.ztelligence.com/start/index.jsp?PIN=139XYXPQ6HWYW

Fini.

Spirits

Just today, I read about “ghosties” on one of my favorite blogs, Adventures of a Wild Hippie Child.

It made me smile, only because the ghosts, or spirits, of the ones that love me are in my life all the time. They are not a swaying figure that comes and holds conversations with me, but they come, and they make themselves noticed. They come when I need them.

It has not been a whole week since we lost our dog. My son, who is 5, says he is here in the house still. He says he can smell him :). I don’t smell him, but I can feel him, and have caught “glimpses” of him on several occasions. At first, I thought it must be his energy, but now I think he decided to come and stay. I swear that dog lived so long because he felt he had to protect us, and he is back to do just that. Our puppy has been grieving, but perks up at things I don’t see. We welcome him back.

My kids have been raised not to fear friendly spirits, to them it is all part of the “magic” :).

For me, stress turns into headaches. A few weeks ago, I had a terrible day, things just got chaotic. To the point that my daughter, 9, ordered me to go lay down on my bed and sleep. She could handle everything. I did just that. I fell asleep immediately, out of pure exhaustion and headaches. My father showed up in my dream and surprised me. He held out his hand to me. When I grabbed his hand, my hand became warm and tingly. So I gave him my other hand too. In my dream. Then I hear my daughters’ voice calling me. She is waking me up, because she came to check on me and I felt “hot” to her touch. There she was stroking my head :). I felt better, and knew that my father was there to let me know that I was going to be alright.

I wish I could make appointments……