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Goddesses with Magic in their belly

Custom Goddess I recently finished.

The first Goddess I made was for myself.

She literally came to me to keep me from going insane.

My daughter was five, and my son was just a few weeks old, and I thought I was going to loose it. Now, I think I may have had a bought of Postpartum Depression, then I just thought I was overwhelmed. One night, the Goddess just popped in my head, a beautiful round form, with the message to go to the craft store buy some clay and make it happen. She was big and purple, and a little crude, but I put her on a silk string and wore her ALL THE TIME. Her weight on my chest, and the fact that I could grab her when in need, gave me a certain confidence.

Strangely enough, I cannot find a picture of her anywhere today. She was the beginning of my Goddess journey. People began commenting on her, asking me if she was a fertility Goddess (she had similar forms as the Goddess of Willendorf). Inside: “Hell no, I made her because these two beautiful humans I have are driving me insane!” On the outside, I smiled and said “No, she is the Goddess for whatever you need her to be”.

Friends began asking me to make them Goddesses for different reasons. Then I made one for a friend who was trying to get pregnant for a long time, and she made the announcement a few months later. With that, I became the Goddess Maker.

I would make Goddesses with trinkets, herbs, stones, even hair, all kinds of things in their belly, including lots of intention specific to the person I was making her for, and Moon Magic.

I also began making “everyday” Goddesses, knowing that the right person would find their Goddess, but continued making custom Goddesses over the years.

Now, I take on a limited amount of custom Goddesses. They are beautiful and draining at the same time. The take my energy, and my patience. When I take on a custom Goddess project, I always explain the ritual, because that is exactly what it is: a ritual. I also let the potential wearer know that in the end, I may not be able to make them a custom Goddess at all. It is rare, but has happened.

Once I have been told the “mission” of the Goddess, I can usually see her within a few minutes of talking. I get an idea of favorite colors, but honestly, the Goddess goes where she pleases. I have had Goddesses change color completely 3+ times! Once I see her and pass that on, the making process begins! I incorporate the belly magic, paint, paint, paint. That is when the Tango begins. The Goddess and I dance back and forth, until we finally agree and I can finish. I have made them for recently graduated women firefighters, much wanted pregnancies, Menarche boxes, gifts for little goddesses, sister Witches, etc. The missions are endless & wonderful! Then I just have to wait for a Full Moon to bless her, and she can be off to to her magic!

Much Love,

P.S. You can find YOUR Goddess here. Or contact me at heike (at) for custom Goddess availability. xoxo

Even good Shit can get overwhelming

It is 3am, and I am contemplating the purpose of life.

I was asleep, but was awakened by my frantic dog, barking at the door and intermittently coming to get me to tell me something is wrong. A houseparty up the the street from me must have exploded, there are hundreds of loud, slightly stupid sounding kids on my street. God, I hope my kids never sound or act like that. I can hear the police approaching, the crowd outside is getting antsy.

Anyways, I digress. 25 minutes later the street was back to its’ normal, quiet, sleepy suburbian boring self. My dog is now sleeping soundly under my bed, and I am fully awake.

After several rounds of guided meditations, a sleepy tea, an audiobook that did not grab me, some exercise….I decided to go the library and play book roulette. “A Love Story” popped up, I put it on my iPad, and was pleasantly surprised. An collection of short stories!

The first story is about Mavis, who locks herself in a bathroom for a week to think.

I have not finished the story, but am in love with Mavis. And I am jealous that I only have one bathroom. The thought of locking myself into a bathroom for a week, with food that I love (not nourishing, that I love), books, magazines, something to write, and maybe my wi-fi, is fantastic. I would also buy myself a one cup coffee machine for this adventure.

Lately, I have been restless and sleepless, and all around annoyed. I am not sure what is triggering this insolence, but I can feel little tentacles of bitchiness coming out. In one way, it is helping, as I am ruthlessly purging things that don’t make me happy, and that is a big feat right now. On the other hand, I took a pause in reading with Mavis to ask myself “What is wrong?”.

7733821_origI have a great family. I am not kidding, my husband, though truly nerve wracking, is a good and hardworking man. And obviously gifted with a inhumane amount of patience, as we will be married 20 years next week. I am not easy. My kids are both fantastic, spoiled, but fantastic. I have a house in suburbia, lots of stuff in it to keep my creative spirit busy, a dog, chickens, a back yard, wi-fi…..I don’t have a 9-5, so my crazy sleep/ no sleep schedule is doable. I really don’t know how I would function in the real world, I would have to take drugs.

Back to Mavis living in her bathroom. I am drawn to her because we are both yearning for the simple life. I am almost feel as if my life, and the stuff in it, are taking my breathe away. I am tempted to pimp out my van and go live in it. But then where would everyone else sleep?? How would the kids get to school and function? Who would cook heavy, meat based dinners for my hardworking husband, and where would all this damn laundry go??

Sitting here in the quiet, yet chaotic dining room sipping my warm milk with turmeric, I think I have hit the nail on the head.

Too much shit. Even good shit can get overwhelming.

Too many little responsibilities and needs of others suck away energy from the true purpose of what I am here for. Don’t get me wrong, being the mother of these gorgeous humans, and the wife/friend to my husband, the daughter to my mama, and the friend to my few, but true friends is fulfilling. Yet, I also want to find the energy to work with young women, find my witchy circle of women for ritual and growth, go camping by myself in the redwoods, publish my ebook, make KitchenWitches for fun and give them away (I had this dream that I traveled around and delivered custom KitchenWitches to women in different situations, and just made their day. I was like Ellen, only with Witches. It was fabulous, and now is on my “to do” list), things that make my spirit grow and bring in money to support it all comfortably. On that note, I also want another shepherd puppy.

It is time make things clear and simple again, and I need to do it before I am 79 and locked in a bathroom.

How are you finding your life’s purpose, Beautiful??

A letter to my 13 year old self

In 2007, I was 38, I wrote a letter to my 13 year old self as part of a blog Meme.

I loved reading this again, and will now add my 40’s.

I hope this inspires you to write to your budding teenage self!

(clearing throat, wiping eyes)

Dear Heike,

Yipee! You are 13!! Finally, you hit your teens. Isn’t this the day you have been waiting for? If you could only be like all the other thirteen year olds…but you can’t. It is ok, soon, you will not have to change so much to fit in. Actually, you will be honored because you are so different.

The rest of your teens are filled with adventure, a few authentic friends, and many people who just want to take advantage of you. Heed them! And do not let them into your house. You will know who your true friends are, and they will be with you for a long time. Be nice to your mama, she is doing the best she can. If I could keep you off that motorcycle, I would. Too many close calls :), but you are a bit of a wild child with a very sensible brain.

Fuzzy blast from my 20’s past

Your 20’s start out with a bang, and an accident that will change your life. You will think it is the end of the world, but it is not. You will survive the pain, the uncertainty, and all the follow up operations. And you will carry all the scars with pride, because you have conquered. When you are MUCH older, you will discover Frida Kahlo, the courageous and ingenious artist who had a brace just like you. I promise, you will overcome. A man you can’t stand to be around becomes your soulmate, and you will marry him. When you are 28, you will have a baby they say you will never have. She is a miracle.

Your 30’s are pretty awesome. You are a mama now, and you have learned from many of your past mistakes. Everything you endured growing up, will now make you strong and opinionated. You will become a Goddess, and finally find your clan. You will also find your path, and all your past and present dreams will make more sense. They are your calling. You will have another baby, and they are both fabulous. You are an artist, and your hands make you happy.

Your 40’s make you feel like you are 25 again. Not in the body, but the BRAIN! Your Spirit is vibrant, and feisty! You begin to get more interested in politics, because you want to make your home a better place to live. You become a very vocal pain in the butt, and people know your name, even if it is a bit difficult for people to say! Your children are now teens, and they are pretty opinionated, fantastic humans. They are a lot like you are now: primal, smart, feisty, wild, and they drive you crazy. Your daughter is the confident young Goddess woman you wanted her to become, she has enough confidence for a whole country.  You are becoming a mentor for a younger generation, as you walk between the lines of society. You are the keeper of the Goddess, and your work is with women & girls, making them warriors. You are still working with your hands, your dreams, and your intuition.

As you get older, your life just keeps getting better. Just like a good wine ;).


Virgin, Mama, Witch, & Bitch

Dear Beautifuls!
This is an excerpt from the book that I published a few years ago, “Goddess in the Groove ~ Musings from the Goddess Within”. The words hold true today, as they did yesterday. “Bitch” & “Witch” energy is coming up strong lately, so I find it is timely to send this out to you, and the Universe.

I am sharing this with a reminder that no portions of this may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without my permission.  I do want you to share, Beautifuls. Please do! Please just share from here so my words stay true :).

Much love,

Virgin, Mama, Witch & Bitch

  When a girl baby is born, she is already born into a world of “must be”. Women’s roles start at this early stage. Girls are supposed to wear pretty dresses and do “girlie” things. Goddess forbid the little girl child is not “cute”, since little girls are supposed to look like little dolls. How many times do you hear “I wish I had a little girl! I could dress her up and do her hair, they are so fun!”? Little girls that play with boy things, or are dirty, rough, and wear pants all the time, are considered “tomboys” from toddlerhood on, they are just not “real” little girls….

  Puberty comes, and we are confronted with the term “virgin”, but not in the sense of generations past, when being a virgin was a status symbol of high honor. Society has teenage girls believing it is a disgrace to be a virgin. Their peers and their society pressure girls into sex early, thinking it is the thing to do, and the one who actually “does it” is the one who ends up a teenage mama. To the lucky girls, the “virgin” is the stage of beauty and growth. Girls grow breasts, have their first menstruation, and slowly become women. In many societies and cultures, this stage is still honored with beautiful celebrations and rites of passage. We women need to give our girls the knowledge and self-esteem that helps them develop. We have to teach them that THEY have the right to decide over their bodies and their destiny, giving them choices. The “virgin” is a stage of purity and beauty, not just a metaphoric term whether you have had sex or not.

  For most women, the next stage is “Mama”. They get married and become a wife, and the new mama to their husband, or they perform the miracle of birthing a new human child. Some women choose to skip this stage all together; though I believe we all have the “Mama” instilled in us, and play this role for someone or something in our lives. No matter how well we try to prepare, we cannot study up on this role, but grow into it. Intuition and experience turn us into masters, nurturers with the goal of protecting our kingdom. We portray this role with fierceness, and mamas are often compared to tigresses protecting their cub. The variations “Mamas” are as diverse as women themselves: some women stand by their man till death does them part, some women refer to their career or business accomplishment as ‘their baby” and others protect and live for their children.

  The “Witch” is not as the word in the dictionary, but the spiritual side of a woman. Witches, before their discrimination and elimination, were women of great intelligence and honor. Their rank in society was high and powerful. They were healers, and women whose intuition and knowledge let them perform great deeds. They were not always Beauties, but their aura of power and self-confidence made them beautiful, no matter what the outer shell portrayed. When today’s woman reaches this stage, she is ready for change and self-fulfillment. She is ready to find her inner self and true meaning in life. She turns to meditation, psychics, aromatherapy, yoga, or other forms of “natural healing” to comfort her inner spirit. In this stage, a woman stops dieting, dying, and otherwise torturing herself to fit into society’s beauty ideal, she turns her back and starts to find her beauty inside. She becomes more confident, starts making changes, and the “Bitch” comes out.

  The “Bitch” is in us from toddler stage, we just don’t know it. When we discover her in us for the first time, we suppress her due to “etiquette”. But boy, when we need her, is she ever helpful! She is our “other self” that comes out when we fell threatened, cheated, or confronted. When we are in a bad place because something in our life is just not right, our first step to changing it is to become “bitchy”. Some women get stuck on this step for a very long time, but sooner or later they realize it and move forward. Others jump right on up! In corporate America, strong and powerful women are often referred to as “bitches” by their male counterparts or employees of both sexes, because that attitude is what keeps them above ground and in charge. People are intimidated, and of course annoyed, by bitchy women, but if you look at it as a stage of wonderful stage you will see your sisters in a much rosier light!

   Look at yourself, what stage are you in now? And the next time someone calls you a “Bitch”, you can just smile and say “Why, THANK YOU!” The circle is becoming complete.

Angry Women

From my book, “Goddess in the Groove ~ Musings From the Goddess Within”, Witch (Part 2), Pg. 67:

Angry Women

“Women are never supposed to be angry. We are girls; feminine, not brutes.

When a woman blows her top, she is pronounced crazy, hysterical, or otherwise uncontrollable; a menace to society.

It is an age old stigma. Woman are nurtures, we are soft, compassionate, patient. We are supposed to keep our composure, keep it together at all times. We are the empresses of home and family, and both areas need to be cool, calm, and collected. Even as little children, where aggressive play is completely accepted and almost expected for boys, girls who play mildly aggressive are deemed “tomboys”, those that are wilder are probably diagnosed with some behavioral problem. In the “old” days, women and mothers who “lost it”, had a nervous breakdown, or became angry and uncontrollable where put away. They were admitted to cushy or not so cushy mental institutions, where their anger and spirit where drained out of them with drugs, torture methods, or experiments. These women were torn from their life and families, left in the hands of so-called professionals that were supposed to “fix” them and spit them back out, perfect and proper. Just like a wild animal that is tamed by breaking their will and spirit, these women of broken will could snap at any moment and become a lethal weapon.

Today, things are not so harsh and sinister, ….”

(Or are they??)

I decided to post this little snippet from my book today, because “ANGER” is one thing that is still taboo. I personally have learned to realize that my anger never stems from the things that “unleash” it. Anger is deep. I don’t believe anyone who says they can always control their anger, that they never “lose” it. Why? Because they would be dead.

With that said, I was brought to tears today by an email from a woman who has been judged by those who are perfect. Or are they?

I will leave it at that and hope it reaches the right hearts.

Much love,

I have a WINNER, but…..

I cannot reach her!

So, here is a SHOUT OUT!

Jenna @ Goddessworld, email me! You are the lucky winner of this months “Goddess in the Groove ~ Musings From the Goddess Within”!

For everyone else, here is a little excerpt:

Circle of Power

When I recently went to a luncheon hosted in honor of a woman I admire strongly, I was overwhelmed by “woman power”! Peggy O’Mara, the editor/owner of Mothering Magazine, was the Queen Bee for the day, and all around her was the buzz of the “worker bees”, the awesome women who are out there just doing it!
There were about 30 women at this gathering, and when I arrived we all just mingled, chatted, ate a little, and chatted some more. Then the circle was called, and we all found a spot in a big circle of women. We started at one end, and each woman introduced herself and mentioned why she was there. Most of us were there because we love Peggy, (of course!), but it was interesting to find out how each woman arrived at this point in life, and what they were doing with their talents.
Interesting enough, for most of us the change came with the birth of our first child. I am not talking about birth itself, which we know is life altering, but “after birth”, so to speak. I am speaking of the changes, and new found passion, each woman found inside of herself after she became a mother. Each one had a very different story and project. As each women spoke, you could feel the energy rise, and I became completely emotional. By the time it was my turn, all I could say was “me too, same here, that’s’ true!” I felt so humble in this circle of power, though I knew my role there was one of importance. I am a piece of the puzzle.

(Circle of Power, Pg. 62)

You can order a signed copy directly from me here ;).

What I am grateful for: My family

What I am manifesting: Sales!

The good and the bad, the bitchy, the happy, and the sad.

I just read another post about “friends”.

We women really seem to never grow out of the “girlfriend” stage, do we? After being so often disappointed by women who I thought were my friends, I had a stage where I had NO friends at all, because I was tired of the chick stuff.

That passed, and I had some pseudo close friends for a couple of years. I would defend them when my husband called them “fake”, because they were my friends……

He was right :)..I just did not want to register that they never came to my birthdays, never surprised me with a special anything, that they were basically never around when I needed them. Then one day it clicked, and I just let them go.


That was like a good burp, and cleared my Spirit. All of a sudden, great new women entered my life. Women who were the total opposite, but so much more like me because they were so opposite! I kept hearing myself say:”Where have you been all my life??”. They are not always happy, cheerful, beautiful, patient, craft, accomplished, successful, or sober :). But they are fabulous. They love me for me, they respect me for who I am, and if I need them (if only to drink a glass a wine or to talk on the phone after 10:30pm when my house is quiet.), they are there.

And there are my cyber sisters ;). I love you. You guys are here at 3 am with advice, back-up, and laughter.

That is what I call a friend, oui?

Why I blog

I remember reading my first blogs and being wowed by the technical brains of these bloggers. It wasn’t until my friend sent me the witty Dooce that I decided that I need to blog too.

I mean really, where else can I say what I want without someone jumping down my throat or running away in tears (well, they still do, but I have the power of the delete button when they piss me off too bad, or when they are too chicken to show face and post as “anonymous”. I just LOVE me some anonymous….)? Where can I express my creative language freely? Where can I hold heated discussions that FINALLY can be seen by others so that everyone does not call ME the bitch all the time?

This blog was born.

I thought I could reach the world, send out “uplifting” thoughts and rants, gift a sale, etc, etc, etc.

I did not think that I would become addicted, and I did not think that my ego would rise and fall with the number of comments I get :). Really, I thought I left all the need to succeed when I finished high school…..

I also did not anticipate the fabulous women that would come into my life through this little window to the world. Oh my GODDESS!! I had no idea you were out there! Women who I have never met in real life, but that I would walk across hot coals for. And dare you mess with them, I will pull out my roots and deal with you….I just love them, need them, and will make the earth move to make sure my computer is always connected to them. If I did not have them in my little isolated part of the world, I would just wilt away like an abandoned flower…

A few days ago I met yet another woman, one I did not know about. I met her in real life, and when I introduced myself, she smiled and said: “I know you.” You do? I started getting a bit uncomfortable when she asked about my kids and Rex, because now I am thinking I am going to have to be rude and ask her who she is. Then she tells me that she has been reading my blog and website for a long time. She says I make her laugh, and how my posts have often pulled her out of a depression. She says she feels like we are BFF. I asked her who she is, and don’t recognize her name. She does not comment here, or anywhere else :). But she knows who she is, and I think we are going to be good friends, for real.

So when someone recently asked WHY I blog, I could have said:
1. for business
2. for exposure
3. to maximize my marketing
4. as an extension of the community of my website,


But really, I need my girls.
Much love,

Man, they are good!

Today I made it a point to watch Oprah. Tina and Cher were on with her.

I LOVE Tina Turner! One of the last concerts I went to was Tina’s “Private Dancer” concert in Frankfurt! Yes, I am quite old…..

At 61 and 68, Tina and Cher are still powerhouses. They both spoke about how hard it was for them to leave their respective asswipes…uh, husbands…and how they had to pay them off. Good riddance.

There was a huge lesson to be learned, and I am glad my 10 yr old daughter was watching this. These 3 (I am including Oprah) rose of out nothing, but their hard work, strength, and perseverance paid off.

And Tina is touring again!! Those tickets went right on my birthday wishlist….

5 Minutes for Mom Party!

Welcome to my party! Thank you for 5 Minutes for Mom for sponsoring this fabulous palooza! I will introduce myself quickly for those who have never been here:

Hello, my name is Heike, and I am the owner of Goddess in the Groove, a website for women with opinions :). I started this website when my daughter was just a baby, because I realized how much work it would take to raise a strong, inspired, intelligent, non-judgmental, and proud little girl in this society. I decided the first step was to create a caring and non-judgemental place for strong, inspired, intelligent, and proud women to congregate and help me out :).

This blog is an extension of my website, a chatter place. This is where I connect, share, laugh, and learn. Enjoy, explore, and sign up for the email feeder to your right(right under the cover of my book :)..) to join my community!

I love a surprise! Everyone who signs up for my email notification during the party week, March 7-14, will be entered into a raffle to win a copy of my new book “Goddess in the Groove ~ Musings From the Goddess Within”! All you have to do to enter is sign up to your right (under the cover of my book).

Enjoy the little Party Announcement from my kids by clicking on the link below!

My favorite impromptu party recipe:

1 Cream Cheese (put on a pretty plate)
1 Jar of Pineapple Salsa (pour over cheese)
Crunchy chips

Dip in! Heavenly!!

P.S. If you have not checked out the divine prizes, do so now :)!
My favorites, picked by my daughter, are:

103 — 7 Pink Brick Box Play Sets
Provided by: LEGO

91 — Burt’s Bees Naturally Ageless skin care line
Provided by: Geggie

136 — Knitting Goody Bag
Provided by: Craftymom

It was hard…THANK YOU!